25 Spanish Truths, Lessons, and Anecdotes
1. Ham is the Spanish national vegetable
2. It's not unusual to see a man accessorize with both a newspaper and a baguette
3. Don't bring up what fútbol team you support unless you're willing to debate every major life decision you've made that led you to this erroneous conclusion
4. Work is a thing you do, not who you are
5. Every song, absolutely every song has a techno remix version
6. Ketchup-flavored Fritos
7. "Molesting" = bothering
8. "Castigate" = punish
9. "If you don't stop molesting the class, you'll have to be castigated"
10. Pero, like...
11. If you're American, why are you not fat ?
12. Waiting in line to get into Kapital, and I see the drunkest of girls stumbling toward me. She's wearing six inch heels, and about 4 inches of fabric cover her tush. D.C. (Drunk Chick) topples about three times before she finally reaches me. There is no skin left on her knees from all the the hard falls she's taken. In a frenzy, she puts her hand on my shoulder, looks me straight in the approximate location of my eyes and says, "Help me! You have to help me!" Remembering the first aid training I got from that episode of Arthur where he has to get a tetanus shot because he got a nasty scrape at the junk yard, I realize I am way under-supplied for this project. "Lo siento pero..." "Lipstick, I need lipstick!"
13. Candy is the wifi of yesteryear
14. Of course Taco Bell serves beer.
15. Of course your local bakery/breakfast spot serves beer.
16. Of course you can come. Bring beer!
17. Khakis? Why?
18. Foul-mouth four-year-olds galore!
19. U.S.: Out till 3:00 AM = Champ!
Spain: Out till 3:00 AM = You're only going to party for half the night?
20. PDA everywhere. There have been times on the metro when a couple is making out so close to me ear, that I have felt inducted into a polygamous relationship.
21. Fahrenheit = (9/5) x (Celsius+32)
22. Café con leche can actually be quite relaxing when enjoyed at Plaza Mayor...pero en vidrio no en tasa
23. Your day does not end just because you're home from work. That's when your life can begin.
24. I have spoken way more Spanish in my little suburb of New Jersey, than I have ever here in Madrid.
25. No statement is ever complete until you have employed the use of the word "vale." Vale.
American hugs, Spanish kisses
2. It's not unusual to see a man accessorize with both a newspaper and a baguette
3. Don't bring up what fútbol team you support unless you're willing to debate every major life decision you've made that led you to this erroneous conclusion
4. Work is a thing you do, not who you are
5. Every song, absolutely every song has a techno remix version
6. Ketchup-flavored Fritos
7. "Molesting" = bothering
8. "Castigate" = punish
9. "If you don't stop molesting the class, you'll have to be castigated"
10. Pero, like...
11. If you're American, why are you not fat ?
12. Waiting in line to get into Kapital, and I see the drunkest of girls stumbling toward me. She's wearing six inch heels, and about 4 inches of fabric cover her tush. D.C. (Drunk Chick) topples about three times before she finally reaches me. There is no skin left on her knees from all the the hard falls she's taken. In a frenzy, she puts her hand on my shoulder, looks me straight in the approximate location of my eyes and says, "Help me! You have to help me!" Remembering the first aid training I got from that episode of Arthur where he has to get a tetanus shot because he got a nasty scrape at the junk yard, I realize I am way under-supplied for this project. "Lo siento pero..." "Lipstick, I need lipstick!"
13. Candy is the wifi of yesteryear
14. Of course Taco Bell serves beer.
15. Of course your local bakery/breakfast spot serves beer.
16. Of course you can come. Bring beer!
17. Khakis? Why?
18. Foul-mouth four-year-olds galore!
19. U.S.: Out till 3:00 AM = Champ!
Spain: Out till 3:00 AM = You're only going to party for half the night?
20. PDA everywhere. There have been times on the metro when a couple is making out so close to me ear, that I have felt inducted into a polygamous relationship.
21. Fahrenheit = (9/5) x (Celsius+32)
22. Café con leche can actually be quite relaxing when enjoyed at Plaza Mayor...pero en vidrio no en tasa
23. Your day does not end just because you're home from work. That's when your life can begin.
24. I have spoken way more Spanish in my little suburb of New Jersey, than I have ever here in Madrid.
25. No statement is ever complete until you have employed the use of the word "vale." Vale.
American hugs, Spanish kisses
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